How To Stop Being So Sensitive

Coming from a fairly sensitive soul, can I first remind you that your feelings are valid?  If you are hurt or upset, it isn’t up to others to decide if it’s justified.

This article isn’t going to tell you that you must man up and ignore your emotions. I simply don’t think that’s very helpful at all.

And with the prevalence of mental health, it’s really important to be able to authentically and genuinely feel and express your emotions. 

That being said, there may have been a few occasions where you’ve gotten upset in situations you know don’t really deserve quite the reaction.

And even while knowing this, you might not be able to stop those tears from falling. It seems difficult to end that loop in our mind that plays that hurtful or awkward situation.

What I learned from my own sensitivity is that this reaction will more often come from you and what you read between the lines than it does from what was actually said or done.

I found that once I found some inner peace within myself, I became much less sensitive in general. 

So throughout this article, we’ll take a  look at some of the things that you can do to help let go of some of that sensitivity. 

1. Realize That It’s Most Likely Not About You

Those of us that are particularly sensitive are usually this way because we take things very personally.

But as a species, we’re a fairly self-centered bunch, and that unkind or hurtful thing that happened is much likely to be based on their day. 

So they’re probably not thinking about you. You’re just in the firing line of their problems. It’s not that they hate you or that you did something wrong.

They’ve just had a super bad day, or they’re low on sleep, or they’re stressing about something else. 

Assuming every snappy comment or harsh action is a direct hit to you and your personality is going to lead to sensitivities. And 9 times out of 10, it just isn’t the case. 

2. Don’t Respond

2. Don’t Respond

Sometimes your head can start swirling with ways to reply and comments to make; try to quiet these voices in your head. You don’t have to respond to every slight that you receive. 

You can’t let something go if you hold on to it and create scenarios in your head as to what you could have said or should have said.

And you will just make yourself either more upset or angrier. 

If you decide it doesn’t warrant a response. Stop thinking about it. Let it leave your mind and move on. 

3. Value Your Own Approval

Most people that get very sensitive to what others say or think crave approval or validation from others.

If you can find that sense of approval and validation from yourself, you will become much more unbothered by others’ opinions. 

And at the end of the day, if you believe in yourself and who you are and what you do, then what does it matter what other people think?  

4. Understand That  Negative Feelings Take Time And Effort To Maximize

One thing to try and wrap your head around if you are sensitive is that a lot of the time we escalate the issues ourselves.

Something can start off as a small niggly feeling that we then spend the effort and time building up into a much bigger issue. 

Now, this won’t be the case for every experience. But I realized that I was doing this quite often once it was pointed out to me. 

So for example, I could be walking down the street, and someone may give what I am wearing a once over, turn to her friend, and laugh, then continue walking off. 

When this first happens, you might roll your eyes and be mildly annoyed. Say you are at a level 3 out of ten. Now, as I continue walking to my destination, I rant to someone about it over text.

The more I talk about it; I bump myself up to a level 5. 

Once I get to level 5, I’m checking to see if anyone else is staring at me too. I feel self-conscious as well as angry now, and I’m bumping myself up to level 7.

I’m thinking of all the things I should have said to them or what I’d do if someone else does it again. And I push myself all the way to level 10. 

If at that level 3, I’d just laughed it off. Thought how rude and then remembered that I look great in my outfit and ignored it.

Well, It would have quickly plateaued back down to the base level instead of vamping it all the way to the top. 

5. Keep Your Attention In The Present

Looking backward will always make you more sensitive because you are focusing on what happened.

The best way to stop yourself from getting upset over little things is to stop over-analyzing them. Stay in the present moment – keep moving forward. 

Instead of thinking about what the comment someone just said means. Stay in the conversation.

Move away from the trigger as quickly as possible. In most cases, you’ve probably added another meaning to what was said anyway. 

Final Thoughts

Managing sensitivity can be difficult, especially when it’s hard to differentiate between someone that is worthy of getting upset about and something that is not.

Remember that your feelings are always valid and it’s not up to someone else to tell you how you should feel or react. 

With that being said though, if you try to keep the above tips in mind, you may find that those intense feelings of hurt and sadness are much less frequent.

The main thing that will help you become less sensitive is confidence. Once you value yourself enough, you won’t care what others have to say. Or at least not as much.